Understanding Low Self-Esteem

What is Self-Esteem?

Self-Esteem is the opinion we have about ourselves and how we value and perceive ourselves.  Whilst we can all be self-critical at times, or have occasional negative thoughts about certain personality traits, if you are frequently thinking about yourself in a critical or negative way, then you may be suffering from low self-esteem.

Low self-esteem can develop at any time in a persons life for a variety of reasons and can have a negative affect on their school, work, social life and relationships.  When we have low self- esteem we tend to see everything in a negative light and struggle with stressful situations.  When we have a healthy self- esteem, we feel more positive about ourselves and life and feel able to deal with whatever it may bring.       

Causes

There are many reasons why a person might develop low self-esteem these can include:

·      Being bullied, abused or mistreated

·      Physical health issues

·      Mental health problems

·      Stress or stressful life events

·      Losing a job or having difficulty finding one

·      Having money issues or having problems finding somewhere to live

·      Problems at school or work

·      Experiencing racism, discrimination or prejudice

·      Relationship problems, family issues or bereavement

·      Feeling insecure about your appearance or body image

·      Feeling pressured to meet expectations of family or friends

Signs of Low Self-Esteem

·      Always blaming yourself when something goes wrong

·      Having difficulty accepting compliments

·      Believing other people are better than you

·      Always focusing on negative and never positive things about yourself

·      Having feelings of sadness, shame, anger, worthlessness, anxiety or depression

·      Using humour to make negative comments about yourself

·      Thinking you don’t deserve to be happy or have fun

·      Getting easily upset by criticism or disapproval

·      Avoiding doing thinks as you fear you will fail

·      Making critical comments about yourself

Self-Help

There is a lot of information on-line that can help, including organisations and groups that can share their experiences.  You can do several things to help improve your self-esteem including:

·      Exercise, meditation and mindfulness will help improve your mood as will be outside in green spaces

·      A healthy diet and ensuring you get a good nights sleep will help lift your mood

·      Do the things you enjoy most as it will make you feel positive

·      Spend time with people who make you feel good about yourself and avoid people who bring you down

·      Don’t try and be perfect or stress over mistakes – no one is perfect or faultless

·      Concentrate on things you can change and don’t worry about the things you can’t

·      Focus on things that you are good at and give yourself credit for them

·      Volunteer to help people as it will make you feel positive and good about yourself

·      Be kind to yourself and say positive things to yourself and avoid comparing yourself to other people

Professional Help

If you are still struggling with building your self-esteem, you might want to consider seeing a psychotherapist, who can help you using a variety of therapies. These can include therapies, like counselling and psychotherapy as well as  clinical hypnotherapy and CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy).  Written by Jan, Jeana and Wendy at Barnsley Hypnosis and Counselling (UK). For more free Information click above link.